1143 GMT -- IRAN -- Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has written a letter to U.S. President George W. Bush proposing "new solutions" to the current diplomatic impasse, an Iranian government spokesman said May 8. The letter was sent via the Swiss Embassy in Tehran, which maintains a U.S. interests section. It is the first letter sent from an Iranian leader to a U.S. president in 27 years.
"Oh Georgie,
I see you in those tight jeans and I can't help it any more. Can't we put all our fights aside, and have some make up, well ..... you know ...... It's been so long, and all these guys have scarred and bloody backs. I don't care about the money or those destroyers, and you can go ahead and pay those vitctims families from our frozen funds, I just want to be with you, you Texas hound. I'm sorry for Khobar, we won't do that again, and I already have Mugniyeh gagged and bound for you. But please, don't ask me to kiss any jews.
Foget that Laura woman, she can't give you what I can"